Darlene "the Bean" and toddler

Specific, well-timed feedback is key to building lasting self-esteem

Positive feedback is a wonderful thing, but we may be doing a disservice to our children when we just say “Good job, good job.”

How can praise ever be a bad thing? Well, maybe it’s not a bad thing but it can be empty and children will always be able to recognize it when it is. But well-timed, specific praise can be very powerful in building self-esteem and encouraging a love for gymnastics and physical activity in general.

The big praise pay-off

Think about your students like vending machines. When they’re little, you put a coin in and you get something out. You praise them and you immediately see that reflected.

Then they get a bit older. Now maybe it takes a couple of coins put in before you get something out — but what you get is maybe bigger, more substantial. And so on and so on.

Every time you tell a child what they did that was positive, you are adding a coin to the pile — building their self-esteem, helping them see just how far they’ve come.

You keep putting your money in and one day it is guaranteed, that child’s self-esteem, their performance, their motivation, all of it will hit a jackpot.

Be specific and genuine

Sometimes, we use the words “good job” when what we mean is “good try.” That’s why it is so important to be specific when recognizing an accomplishment.

Sometimes, with younger children, I’ll use stickers to reinforce my praise. If a little one kept their legs straight, I will tell them they did good at that particular skill and place a sticker on their knee. Good body position means a sticker on the shoulder.

By the end of the class, they may be covered head to toe in reminders of their success but they will remember what each one means and it will hold weight and importance. They’ll know they have truly earned something, and that feeling of accomplishment should never be underestimated.

And next class, that child will remember not only how to hold their legs straight or keep body position, but they will remember that yes! They can do it!

With all of our programs, we include a big certificate with the list of all the things that happened in the lesson plan. Tools like these help remind the children (and their parents, as well as us as coaches) of everything they have achieved and all the ways they have been recognized.

Your words, as well as all these others tools — the stickers, the certificates, the awards — they all work together to remind that child how worthwhile their hard work has been and just how far they have come.

From Darlene “The Bean”

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